Sunday, March 29, 2009

It is Sunday morning, early. Early as in, I am supposed to be sleeping but I am up with Big Man and his wonderful, sweet girlfriend. It is official, I think. Anyway, I am keeping her no matter what Big Man does or says.

Sweetness is almost fully recovered from her surgery and back to normal. She is still getting used to being able to talk, yawn and do the everyday things without a bubble under her tongue. She rocks with a wonderful, loving attitude. Nothing will stop her as long as she keeps this up.

Big Man II is rocking along. His dental work was done quickly and he did not go in wailing. flinging arms, or biting anyone. He calmly, but reserved, walked in holding the doctor's hand to have the major work done. He was done in about two hours and cried for the first time that day. He said his mouth was not feeling normal and he did not like that feeling. He had me rolling with his comments. He was eating by noon with no problems. For a few days he had a hard time biting his teeth together because of the caps, but could eat with no issues.

As for me, I am dealing with a lot right now. I am wondering if I can handle going from taking care of the family all day everyday to taking care of my Mom after her surgery with no down time. I am in need of my wonderful Hubby to restore my mind and heart before I can give to anyone else. That sounds like I have no self confidence, I do, I just need to be refilled by being a wife and nothign else for awhile. Three deployments in four years is difficult on anyone. I feel as if I am losing my mind right now and we still have quiet a few weeks to go. I am torn between taking care of Mama and taking care of myself.

I have heard of so many things of why my Mom needs me, I just don't know if I could live up to them. I feel as if I am just coming into my own and I need to feel out where I am going. I know what I want to be and how to get there. I do not want to be side tracked anymore and really just wnat to be a wife, mom and friend right now. Nothing more and nothing less.

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